From me to you
Love lost its meaning for me, when she looked at with me with love but never with an intention to put me first. Love lost its meaning for me, when I felt my heart crushing at the hands of my loved ones.
Love lost its meaning for me as it traumatised my soul. Hence love was never infinite warmth for me, it was holding a stem without the rose while the thorns dig into my palm.
Everyone is someone’s fool so I am yours
I will let you break my heart over and over
My heart sinks at yet another strike,
My legs are sore from running away and yet finding myself in the same spot,
My heart is tired of trembling at every loud noise,
The scared little girl i thought i outgrew is once again sitting beside me on the bathroom floor, She is trembling, so I wrap my arms around her and we both wait till the nightmare is over,
My bones feel fragile, and my soul is tired of seeking for a safe place, where silence is peace not the calm before the storm,
My eyes keep finding a saviour so I stare at my reflection in the mirror,
I have been told I ask for too much,
~but is it too much to ask for a few moments of tranquillity in my mother’s embrace?
I kept licking my wounds, while you kept on bleeding.
I kept breaking our silent midnight promises while you kept on believing in them
I kept pushing you down the cliff while hoping you will pull me out of the dark pits
I kept saying I love you while all I did was reignite your dormant pains
I kept looking for your love while tip toeing my way out
I kept claiming to know you while all I know is nothing
I kept asking for your warmth while you were burning for me
I kept oozing my love while hiding my lies under the seamless smiles
I kept losing you while holding on to the worthless
~I wandered from one street to another but it’s you that I found at every corner
In the hues of brown I lost my being and never found it again. Those eyes gave me a glimpse of my entire world yet i couldn’t claim any of it.
The urge to melt away in Her embrace sallows me alive. My eyes burn in search of Her smile. My hands yearn to caress her face. My lungs long to be pervaded by her breath. My body keeps on tossing in the hope to find Her warmth.
For I will think of Her in pensive nights, For I will look for her in immense crowds.
Indeed,
She is the name engraved in every bone of mine
She is the thought that accompanys me at all times
How do I believe your heart loves me,when I see my reflection in your wounds. How do I say I love you, when I ran over you in cold blood.
Years ago You told me to feel every feeling so I dismantled all the walls I built, brick by brick. I stripped myself, piece by piece. I carefully stringed my feelings, pearl by pearl. I engraved your name inside my body, bone by bone. I cut myself, layer by layer until I reached my heart and there I entrusted you with my raw heart
~I ran so far for you that I forgot the way back home…
I was slow dancing in the dark with you until I stumbled towards the light and unearthed myself dancing alone
I can twist it in fabricated words but simply our bottom line is ~I lost you and you lost me
Under the blazing daylight I want to conquer the world, but at night all I desire is to be someone to you
So if you ever wonder where I am, I am right where you left me, leaning by the door frame with tears in my eyes watching you leave.
Even after all those years, I will still want my first love twice
I will love you over the course of time, my love will keep on piling up like the miles that keep on extending between us, through the tears I shed and through the years I spent without you, For i will always love you
~All this water in the oceans but still not enough to wash away the bloodstains you left
All I ever did was yearn for you, I miss you even when you are right beside me for you are not mine or this place is yours so you will leave and I don’t even have the right to make you stay
~Oozing love in places that were already filled
Your desolate eyes are far more noticeable to my heart than a thousand glares filled with fascination
~Love might be unexplainable but surely you can measure its depth by the wrecks it left behind
Indigo 